An old friend from school emailed me tonight for a catch-up. During the messages that went back and forth, she reminded me of the time I sneaked into the store cupboard with my cookery teacher’s driving shoes, smashed eggs into them and then put them into the freezer. Then I sat at the front of class mouthing to her, ‘I love you’ while she was trying to teach and that is the person I want to be again one day. Not this shadow of a life lived before, but the mischievous, fun-loving woman I should be. That is my goal. Maybe not smashing eggs into shoes but being so much more than I am right now.