It’s dark, raining, windy and gloomy. The weather is matching my current mood perfectly. I drove to the beach today, sat in the car and watched the world go by. I thought about Jeanie and I thought about Tom and Annie. I can’t do it. I don’t want to do it. I don’t want to be with him and go back to the abuse but I don’t know what else I can do. I feel so lost.