Phil emailed me for the first time since he ended things. I can’t help thinking he did it because he knows it’s my child-free weekend coming up and he’s hoping I’ll weaken. He emailed to send me a picture and words he found which he thought I’d like; we both know it was an excuse. I’ve been doing so good without him in my life and making some positive changes and I don’t want to start all that up again, but him just emailing me I can feel my resolve weakening, strangely not because I’ve missed him, or because I love him, but because I feel I should because he wants me to. I’m getting caught up and feeling duty-bound to his emotions.

I need to look at this and challenge it. I need to question why I feel I have to respond to someone, to him, just because he contacts me. Why I instantly feel pressured to ask how he is and that I will feel I have to get into chatting with him if he continues it.

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