And Yet Still

Annie and I decided to take Jasper for a walk and then go on to Mum’s. When Tom rang to see what we were doing we asked him if he wanted to join us. I really wanted him to say yes and was so happy when he did. I picked him up and we made our way to the beach. The sun was shining and it was unseasonably warm but Tom managed to somehow feel cold and a little distant. He got in a few digs about the way I am with Jasper and he didn’t seem as approachable as did yesterday. We then went on to my Mum’s where he became friendlier and by the time I dropped him back home, he was nicer, touching my arm, although probably only because we’d just had a few slightly heated words about my driving, with him telling me that my driving worries him despite there being nothing wrong with the way I drive at all. Despite me reminding him I’d never had an accident or even a near miss yet just yesterday he’d had a near miss while I’d been in the car with him and yet still, I crave him. Still, I long for his love more than the love of anyone else. 

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