
Gary rang up this morning and apologised for what he said last night. I let rip at him and didn’t spare him even an ounce of how pissed off I was. He took it all and repeated over and over how sorry he was but it just doesn’t change how fucking horrible he was.
The one and only time I’ve ever asked him for any support and he made it all about himself. It doesn’t matter how much I’ve supported and helped him over the last four months, he couldn’t even give me one minute of his time. I was so angry and upset, not only about him but about my cousin’s death that I spent most of the day crying and by the evening, with Annie at Tom’s I just had to get out of the house. I ended up around my friend, Sam’s with a bottle of vodka and a Chinese which was exactly what I needed – a shoulder to cry on. Unfortunately for me, it wasn’t the shoulder I wanted but the one I wanted refused to be there for me.