I came across an article today about people that are single at heart and I think it sums me up perfectly. I love having a man in my life but only part-time. I love the fun times, going out, having sex, doing things with a man that just aren’t the same with female friends but I don’t want it all the time and I don’t ever want to live with a man.
At heart, I am single. I think I always have been and probably always will be. The more I read up on it, the more it resonates. I’m just not cut out for 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. It’s just not me. I like my own space too much and I like making all my own decisions, and as enjoyable as it is to have a man around occasionally, I do not want it all of the time. I like to consider myself to be single for almost everything in life. I do have moments when I think I want the full works – a man, marriage – but most of the time, I don’t. Maybe that’s part of the reason why I can’t make this work with Gary and why we argue so much. I’m just not totally committed to it.