Moments of Love

I woke this morning having had a dream about love. A man had his arms around me and kissed my neck. The embrace was one of love. I felt loved and I loved him in return.

It made me think not about the times I haven’t been loved, but about the times I have. The time Danny and I made love in front of the open fire, listening to Percy Sledge’s When A Man Loves A Woman and us both crying throughout as we wouldn’t see each other for two weeks. (We were sixteen!) Danny told me he loved me over and over, I repeated the same words to him. As I was falling asleep afterwards, Danny whispered in my ear, “I love you” causing my heart to explode.

Tom kissing me on my head when we were not going to see each other for a while was all the confirmation of his love that I needed; so tender.

Phil’s every word and every action. Full stop.

Theo holding my hand over dinner, not wanting to let go, leaning over the table to kiss me.

Gary holding me close and kissing me in a pub full of his friends.

I haven’t had a consistent love and I haven’t had millions of moments but I have had some lovely moments of love and that’s what I will always hold on to. I’ve loved, I’ve been loved. It may not have been what I’ve dreamt of since being a young girl;  one man, one woman, one deep mutual, kind, respectful, loving team creating a family and being together until death but that doesn’t mean there haven’t been moments and so, as is my way, I will cling to the positives throughout and I will remember that there has been love. Several moments of wonderful, soul drenching love.

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