I had another counselling session today but I really didn’t want to go. All morning I kept thinking of excuses … More
Tag: Childhood Trauma
The Attraction of Physical Contact
My weekend to myself seems such a long time ago and yet it was only 24 hours ago that I … More
An Unexpected Storm
I’ve been trying to work through the list that I wrote in April when I purged through a ton of … More
Time To Find The Positives
I barely slept last night, I tossed and turned, I woke constantly. I kept waking in fear that someone had … More
Imperfectly Perfect
I went to Linda’s for a massage today, after I’d got over a couple of hours of anxiety about being … More
Friends Like These
Sometimes something sneaks up on me and takes me completely by surprise. Something that I think I’ve dealt with and … More
My Father’s Playground
At my counselling session today, we talked a bit about Tom and my Dad. I told her how angry I … More
Emotional Substitutes
At counselling today we talked about Phil and a little about Tom. On the way to counselling, Tom, who had … More
Balancing
I saw Pam, the counsellor again today. Pam wanted to continue what we’d started with Mum last time. She said … More
Understanding
After putting off seeing Mum and being two weeks late for Mother’s Day, I finally went round there today. I … More
Butterflies
I’ve had a headache ever since I wrote Purging. I’ve had anxiety butterflies, I constantly feel sick, my skin feels … More
Purging
Mum always used to cook a roast dinner on a Sunday. Every week she would passively-aggressively slam cupboards, pans, plates … More
Scraping the Surface
I saw my counsellor for the second time today. She asked how my week had been and if I knew … More
Against The Wall
I’m really restless and stressed this morning. There’s a workman here replacing the broken gate and that makes me uptight. … More
Judgement Healing
This morning I woke feeling much better than I have for the last few weeks. I felt positive, balanced and … More
Resistance is Futile
The last few days have been so difficult, I feel sick constantly, I can’t eat, I can’t sleep, I have … More
Open Doors
It was Uncle Kevin’s funeral today. I didn’t want to go. All week I’ve been dreading it, I just cannot … More
Invalidated
We decided to spend the bank holiday having a barbecue. As we knew Tom would be at a loose end … More
Missing Mojo
I’ve lost my mojo. I’ve spent the past few days searching everywhere I can think of but its nowhere to … More
Deep
When you have a counselling session that goes quite deep it can leave you feeling a little bit like you’re … More
What Love Isn’t
I replied to an email from my friend, Rachel today about her abusive ex and the new man in her … More
Russian Dolls
At my counselling session today Sam gave me a set of Russian Dolls and asked me to take them home … More
Weight of The World
When I left Tom I had no choice but to apply for financial assistance in the form of some benefits. … More
Letter To James
A few weeks ago when I was right in the midst of terror and crisis, I got back in touch … More
The Pink Blanket
When I was a little girl I used to escape from a painful childhood by retreating to my bedroom and … More
The Children Suffer Too
For the last year of living with Tom, Katie would come home from school, go straight to her bedroom and … More
The 1000 Piece Jigsaw Puzzle
I had another dream last night. My dreams lately are really interesting and are telling me a great deal. I … More
Oppression
I had a dream last night that really disturbed me. As the day has gone on, the feelings have become … More
Delving Into Money
The counselling is really making me look at and question every aspect of my life. It’s forcing me to delve … More
Dismissed
My psychotherapist, James, says that I dismiss myself. Maybe I do but when did it start? I know that Tom … More
Controlled
Despite what the counsellor said about me being negative, I’m starting to have doubts. I think she was wrong. Maybe … More
Seeing The Negatives
I had another counselling session today and have come to realise that the way I am with Tom is becoming … More
